This weekend has been a rollercoaster so maddenning that if it was a ride at Disneyworld, there's no way I'd pay to get on it. 

Both days I had to get up at 3:45 am to get ready for the 4:00 am WBCOOP games. Saturday actually went quite well, I played three WBCOOP games and made to the money in all three. In one (PLO), I even got a third bracket ticket - $16.50 SCOOP. While I can use my $5.50 tickets for MicroMillions, there's no current use for the higher one. I think SCOOP is out in May, so here's hoping I can put the ticket to good use.

I also played OSL, Women's Play Money, March Mayhem, and BronzeStar FPP. I didn't win anything.

Today I played Deep Stack, Omaha Hi/Lo, and NLHE Turbo and busted out of all three. In fact, it feels like it was a week ago. After busting out of the Deep Stack, I still had an hour to go before The Big Bang, so I tried to go back to sleep but every time I closed my eyes I saw PokerStars tables and Aces and Kings flying out at me. I couldn't stop beating myself up over busting out of what should be the easiest game to play for what I've learned so far.

The Big Bang was at 7 am. I made another cup of coffee and settled in to try and at least min-cash as $25 would have been huge for my bankroll of almost nothing. I chipped up quite well at the beginning and was sitting comfortably at about 57, knowing I had enough to get more chips by the time the blinds came around. At some point I got KK and was pretty stoked as I was SB and could raise. But some guy in MP raised about a standard raise that I could afford comfortably. First mistake: I called. Enters the villain: the guy to my left re-raised all in. I thought to myself: what's more important going out like an idiot half way through the game or min-cashing. Min-cashing was important. Second mistake: I folded. The original raiser folded too.

Then I realised this villain was going to raise all hands all the time. Every time I tried to steal his blind, he'd go all in. I gave up on that pretty quickly. Then he started raising earlier and earlier. He made something every time or everyone folded. 

Then another guy appeared to my right playing exactly the same strat. So I couldn't raise anything and in most times had a raised hand by the time it was my action. Eventually I was blinded down to about 4 BB. There were only 77 people left and I had to only wait out 23 more to get paid the biggest prize of my life. But no good hands were coming.

So what do you think I did? I f*cking called the raise with 55 and made nothing. Out 77th or 76th, can't remember. Spent the rest of the day beating myself up about folding the Kings. Just feel like such a terrible player. I watch videos, I read books, I browse the forums, but fail and fail and fail.

Then I played two WBCOOP events and busted out in both. Then I played OSL twice and busted out in both. Played BronzeStar FPP and busted out before the money too. Played two STTs for FPP and lost in both. Not.A.Good.Day. Scratch that, terrible player.

I played nine more 25c SNGs towards my Cowboy Challenge and cashed twice - 7th and 4th. So while I can still afford to play 10 more because of it, I'm certainly not going up towards the goal of $12.50. Horrid.

All in all I played 12 hours of poker straight each of two days and have nothing to show for it.

Oh hey, if you got depressed about reading about how I've been wasting my time and money, I thought I'd remind you that on Friday was the International Women's Day. Well, actually, Doyle Brunson's book says you're probably buoyed by the idea of someone else losing, so enjoy then and I hope you have better skill and luck at the tables.

Here's some flowers in my lounge right now, I love these oriental lilies - the smell is intoxifying.

And I should mention that despite all my bad pokering, it was really enjoyable to socialise with 85FastLane, Roland, and RoyalRaiser at the tables when I saw them. Thanks for making PSO a great community, especially for those of us that fail at the reason for being here. 

Check out my forum thread sometimes. Take care.