The reason I say I can still smile is as of 2day this is my 4th month of playing the game & as 4 being my career I had better have some very deep pockets full of $ if it is. I play because most of the time I enjoy the game & many of u who r playing. Yes there r times when I feel anger but that I can say is only when I c someone lose a hand or get bumped from a tourney & they r immediately on the chat insulting the player who happen 2 beat them. I do not like poor losers, there is nothing wrong with feeling bad about a loss, I would think that is almost normal. It is not fun losing & 4 many playing this game it may even b a little harder as this game has a tendency 2 attrack people who r very competitive, 2 the extreme in many cases. So losses r hard 2 swallow but those who r extremely competitive or partially so can still have honor. Honor shows that regardless of how much or how hard a loss is u can still tell the winner 'good luck' & of course u should add that u hope 2 meet them again in a hand. There is no shame in a loss but should the loser refuse 2 take the loss as a part of the game we hope 2 avoid & try laying the blame along with insults at the winners feet then there is no honor there & they should feel shame 4 their actions. It does not matter if the winner played the hand with 7/2o or AA, it is their hand & who r we 2 say they should not have played those cards? Especially if they had a winning hand. The only cards we have any right 2 speak badly about using r those cards that r dealt 2 us. We can curse all we want about our own hands & muck them often during a bad run, which is part of why I am writing this. I am having a very tough month as far as the School leagues r concerned. In the Qualifier league I was able 2 win a couple & reach the FT quite a few times last month but I have barely made it even as far as half way so far this month, same thing with the Open league except 4 a tourney earlier 2day. It started with a full house of 10,000 players & I played well but was bumped at 455th place. My best finish in this league this month. Lasted longer than 9,545 others so I guess I should not b down on myself but I am, I feel if I was able 2 make 455 then I should have at least made it into the range of players who would get paid 4 playing. My play at cash tables is doing good so I believe I know what is happening. At cash table games u do not need 2 b prepared 2 spend hours playing with a short break each hour which is exactly what u must do in a big tourney. I am having a hard time staying focused as my business is in my thoughts a lot along with other distractions. If I want 2 b a member of these leagues I need 2 make a better showing than I have been. I need 2 set aside the other things that r going on 4 the few hours it will take 2 place among those who r near the top in these leagues. I also need 2 spend time looking at hands played an how they could have been changed 2 show a positive outcome. These r not difficult chores but they r necessary if 1 wants 2 b among those who lead these Leagues, gl all, later, Len.